Friday, September 26, 2008

I'm so sane I just blew my mind

Kudos to all who get the title reference. You can no longer be my friend if you do not. Sorry, them's the breaks.

So, last night I was putting the alarm clock/radio (which I have had since I was twelve, by the way, no joke) back on the nightstand after the painter so lovingly rearranged every item in my bedroom. (Seriously, did the computer chair HAVE to go right on top my fresh clean pillow?!) I got the nightstand out of the bathtub and squeezed it in sideways next to the bed so that we would not only wake on time in the morning, but also be aware of what time it was during the night when Lauren began her nightly shrieks of, "I need you! My room smells!" (The first night after her room was painted, she woke several times, and after the 3rd I thought maybe it was because of the paint smell. I made the mistake of saying this aloud, so now she thinks saying her room smells is a guaranteed ticket to mommy's bed. It was actually my room that got painted yesterday, but for some reason the logic of my room smelling stronger than her room was escaping her at 3:12 this morning.)

Now, back to my point. I knew it was 3:12 thanks to the alarm clock which this post is supposed to be about. If someone would just stop sending my brain off on rabbit trails. (Where did that phrase come from anyway? Are rabbits notorious for wandering aimlessly through the woods in directions they did not intend, all the while leaving trails behind them? Most rabbits I've seen aren't even big enough to leave a trail. Where are these mammoth sized bunnies that are giving rabbits everwhere such a bad rap?) Sorry, I digress again.

I set the clock and did a volume check to make sure it was loud enough to wake us in the morning. Getting only static, I adjusted the dial a bit and was stunned to hear an old Mylon and Broken Heart song ("Trains up in the Sky") on the radio. For those of you who didn't grow up listening to Christian rock (or maybe contemporary . . . who the heck knows the difference), Mylon was big back in the 80's. On one of my recent trips down memory lane, I uploaded a bunch of old songs onto my ipod, and this was one of them. Having not heard this song on the radio since about 1988 or so, I was quite surprised. Even more so because the dial was on the high 107's, and the only Christian stations I know of in town are 93 and 103. So, what was this song doing on 107 something? Hmm. A mystery.

It was near the end of the song, so I kept listening a bit to see what station I was listening to. Didn't say. Just switched to ANOTHER 1980's Christian rock song by the band Stryper. (Yes, I used to listen to Stryper, what of it?) Coincidentally, it was another song that I had put on my ipod a few weeks ago. I wondered aloud if I had gotten the radio connected to the computer or to my ipod somehow. Nope, connected to nothing except the electrical outlet. What could explain this? Maybe the painter, like vaccuum cleaner salesmen, is really a recruiter for some alien cult (you must get that reference in order to be my friend, too) and had done some kind of voodoo to my clock radio. I could think of no other logical explanation. Was I insane, or had my alarm clock somehow after 21 years of faithful service, just magically begun to pick up on what music I feel like listening to? David said to leave it on, maybe I would get a message from God soon. (He was clearly leaning toward the "insane" option.)

This morning: vindication. I am not insane. I awoke to the sounds of "Mr. Sun, sun, Mr. golden Sun, please shine down on me" being sung by the Little People. Now, I know there is something going on because who would would be weird enough to have that children's song and some obscure 80's Christian songs on the same radio station? No one but me, I assure you. Finally, I realized what was happening. The station was apparently 107.9 (hard to tell for sure; it's a dial), which is the station my ipod monster is set to in my van. (A monster is the nifty little device that lets me play my ipod through my van radio.) Yes, call me Sherlock, it only took me 8 1/2 hrs to figure this one out. I had no idea it would work on any radio in the vicinity. This is awesome! I guess. I don't actually listen to the radio in the house except for the three seconds before I beat the crap out of my clock each morning. (I know, I know, I should be kinder to it after all these years. I tell you, it gives David little hope that I grow kinder over the years.)

So, no I am not insane. I'm so sane I blew my mind. Just call me Kramer.

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